Bono Sapiens by Dave Petraglia | Flash Fiction | #thesideshow

June 10, 2017
The Arbor by Aria Riding | Art | #thesideshow
June 9, 2017
5 poems by Joseph Anthony | Micro-poetry | #thesideshow
June 11, 2017

Bono Sapiens



Soon after, I married my girlfriend, Lottie, the daughter of Sandra Dee and Bobby Darin. Her given name was Charlotte. She’s Lottie Dorito now, accepting without hesitation my new surname. To me, she’s ‘Charie’.

Sandra Dee was carrying Charlotte when she and Bobby stopped by Gold Star studio on the invitation of their friends, the Bonos. It was a day of great relief and celebration. Sandra knew her child was a girl, but she’d been under observation for a potential problem with the pregnancy. The doctors thought they’d detected an irregular heartbeat. However, on this very day they pronounced her out of danger, perfectly healthy, and on her way to meet the world on schedule, by the end of that month.

“It was miraculous!” Sandra Dee told Sonny and Cher, “The doctors were so thorough, and though it was a scare for a while, we’ll all be fine!”

“Her heart is okay?” Cher chirped, hugging Sandra.

“Her heart is fine,” Sandra smiled.

“What did the doctor say exactly, what was the problem?” Cher asked.

“It was nothing, he said, ‘the beat goes on’.”

“Wow,” Sonny’s eyes widened.

“Our little Lottie,” Bobby Darin added. “She’s a fighter!”

“You mean Charlotte.”

“Yes, yes of course,” Sandra gushed, “Bobby came up with her nickname, just now, on the way here.”

“She’s got a lotta heart!” Bobbie said.

“Lottie Dee,” Sonny chirped.

He and Cher smiled admiringly at the relieved, expectant parents.

Lottie gotta Dee,” Cher said, hugging Sandra Dee.

Lottie gotta Da,” Sonny pumped Bobby’s hand, then: “Are men still marching off to war?!”

Cher, Bobby and Sandra stared at the peace medallion dangling from Sonny’s neck, their eyes as big as saucers.

“Come on! Let’s jam!

A Best Small Fictions 2015 Winner, Dave Petraglia‘s writing and art has appeared in Bartleby Snopes, bohemianizm, Cheap Pop, Crack the Spine, Chicago Literati, Gambling the Aisle, Hayden’s Ferry, Medium, McSweeney’s, Necessary Fiction, New Pop Lit, North American Review, Per Contra, Pithead Chapel, Points in Case, Prick of the Spindle, Popular Science, Prairie Schooner, Razed, SmokeLong Quarterly and others. His blog is at