Kolleen Carney
Sincere Advice From a Girl Whose Life is a Mess # 7| 1 question | Kolleen Carney
January 12, 2017
January 13, 2017

Micropoetry by Howie Good | #thesideshow

Advice to Self

Keep a list of the items stolen from unlocked vehicles – radar detectors, golf clubs, laptops, cameras, sunglasses, CDs – but use them as needed. Ask why it’s an iPad, and not a WePad. Admit you don’t go to museums to learn how to paint hair. Touch her properly so you don’t creep her out. Avoid any big box store with a sign in the window that says Now Hiring. Discuss the late-season collapse of the Mets with grief counselors. Pretend one size does fit all. Find a place to rest your head. Pray it lasts.


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1 Barroom Pickup

Guy in gold necklace
falls on girl, laughs stupidly –
Claymation penis

2 Couples Therapy

We go to bed mad
and wake up to year’s first snow –
white ash of shadows

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Poetry Is Dead

I’m trying to concentrate
but our stupid dog won’t let me,
pounding his tail on the floor
and whimpering until I get up
from my computer and throw
his fuzzy chew toy down the hall
and stand there as he rushes after it
and then rushes back with the toy
hanging comically from his mouth
so we can do this all over again,
each time like adding another line
to a poem I’ll now never write.

About the Author:

Howie Good is the author of Dangerous Acts Starring Unstable Elements, winner of the 2015 Press Americana Prize for Poetry. His other books include A Ghost Sings, a Door Opens from Another New Calligraphy and Robots vs. Kung Fu from AngelHouse Press (both 2016). He co-edits White Knuckle Press with Dale Wisely.